Feeling a little disappointed.

So, I decided to post the before and after of my left foot. I favor my right and I am very happy with what it looks like so far, but I am not happy; and very worried about my left.

It's actually the second toe that I am worried about and not happy with. As you can see, it is overlapping my big toe more than what it was before and kind of sitting up; and not BESIDE my big toe.

What confuses me is, the right side was way more curled than the toes on my left, but he managed to do a better job on my right than my left. I do remember him saying my toe on my left foot looks battered because he had to work on it harder. Well, I really wish you would have put the same effort into second toe on my left foot, so they at least look somewhat the same AND the toe would maybe then be sitting BESIDE my big toe, instead of almost on top.

These are just my thoughts right now. Over the past few days I have become obsessed with this issue and worried. The toe seems out of alignment and I am trying to tell myself that once the pin is taken out, it will fall into place, but I have looked at 100's of pictures and the toes, with pins in them are side by side.

I hope I am just worried for nothing. I keep staring at the picture and I am starting to wonder if it is over lapping the way it is because he did not straighten it completely, which he said he did not try to straighten it completely because of the way my skin is on the side at the top - curved over a little. So not happy. We agreed that he would straighten it and this is what I expected.

I guess I should have told him about my OCD and this thing I have with symmetry.

Right foot B &A 33 days Post OP

Left Foot B & A 27 days Post OP. 

Another day! 4 weeks and 5 days post op.

I have had to learn the hard way many times too! 

I am counting down the days to getting the pins out! I am so tired of walking like a duck, taking a bath with my feet hanging out of the side of the tub, wearing these boots, shoes or whatever they are, people staring like they have never seen these shoes, boots or whatever they are and sleeping on my side and back.

When I had bunion surgery in 2002, I don't remember feeling this anxious to get it over with, but I'm thinking it could be because I got out more and the pins were out by now.

I don't have any regrets...at all. Just ready for the pins to come out so I can start feeling a little more normal again.

I've been so confused about what to do about my scars. My doctor didn't give me any directions about how to treat and that's kind of frustrating me because I am reading so many different things on the internet. I don't remember what I did to the scars way back when and I don't think I did much, if anything at all; and although you can see the scars a little, they look good. 

Yesterday I started feeling anxious about doing "something" to my incisions to help the healing along and I applied the Newgel scar gel. the next morning I got all paranoid thinking I had scabs on my incisions still and because it tingled after applying it, I decided that wasn't a good idea.

So, after reading a ton of stuff about what to put on the incisions once the stitches come out, to help the incisions heal faster, of all thing, I decided to get some Aquaphor Healing Ointment. I have read that people use Vitamin E, A&D Ointment, Vaseline, Shea Butter & Aquaphor. Oh! And even lotions like Eucerin. I read that keeping it moisturized helps it heal faster. I want things to heal so I can start putting my Newgel+ scar gel on my incisions (again) and I can't apply it until the scabs are gone and the incisions have closed.

Well, with the exception of my pinkie toes, my incisions look like they have closed. In fact, I only see scabs on my second toes. My doctor told me my pinkie toes may look like the incisions have re-opened, but they have not. I can't remember why he said they look this way, but I am going to ask when I go see him next week Monday.

So, one by one, I greased my toes up with the Aquaphor Ointment. I mean, I slapped it on! Feeling good about it, I put clean socks on both feet; then kicked back to watch T.V. Not even 3 minutes later... Oh my goodness! Somebody ring the alarm! My feet are on fire! I need water!!! Water!!!

At first I thought, it's just an intense tingle from the "healing" agents, but then I thought no, this can't be good. What if it's irritating my incisions?!?  I immediately filled a pan with water and washed my feet. I had to get it off! 

No where did I read this would happen! I even read the ingredients and researched each one of them. Maybe it was nothing/normal, but I wasn't taking any chances. I paid $10 for a small jar of this stuff and now I realize I should have just gotten the Vaseline or even the Vitamin E! I bought it from Walgreens and I sure am going to try to return it and get something else. 

So, now I have decided to purchase Vitamin E, Bio Oil or Natural Shea Butter. Really leaning toward Shea Butter. I read that it has some great healing agents.  I just don't like the idea of not doing anything, especially since my incisions on a couple toes are raised and hard. I don't like this and I am too afraid to not do anything. 

I also decided to order the NewGel+ Sheets. I did not order them at first. I only ordered the gel in the tube because I was afraid that my incisions were too small for it to be worth it, but then I started thinking of the benefit of the sheet being on my toes 24/7. The gel may get rubbed off from my shoes, socks or whatever. I had excellent results using the sheets when I had breast implants placed. I would hate for my results to be less than and feel like it's because I did not use the sheets. Better safe than sorry!

I also think the sheets will form a barrier of protection from my shoe, which I may not need, but you never know. The Newgel+ product is more much expensive than many other brands, but this stuff is MAGIC! I'm not kidding; and I dare not try something else just because it's cheaper! No, not on something like this.

I also want to mention that my feet continue to swell, often. But I am walking soooo much better. I don't even need the crutches to be honest. Today they are swelling more often than usual, but I know that this is a normal part of it all. I have little shots of pain here and there, but no major pain at all. The toe that hurts more than any other and it's not constant pain, is my left foot pinkie toe.

I think things are going well so far. I am still having issues with my left foot in terms of appearance. I am really not happy that he did not try to make my second toes look as close to one another as he could. I'm hoping that once the swelling goes down and I heal more, it will look better, but for now I am definitely paranoid about it. I have dealt with foot insecurities for at least 20 years and I didn't do all of this without the desire to end those insecurities. Praying for satisfaction and patience.

Happy Memorial Day!

Today was not the day after all, but the before and after looks great!

Before and after. What a difference so far, right?!  I am not in love with my left foot yet
because it doesn't look as good as my left. I am one those types who has to see everything even and 
it really annoys me that my second toes don't look the same. So far this is the only thing I am
disappointed about.

Good morning!

Lastnight I decided to take the bandages off and clean my feet as good as I could. I am going to be wearing sandals out of the office today (hopefully) and there is no way I could walk around with dead dry skin all over my feet.

I wasn't rough at all on them, but today I woke up and my pinkie toe on my left foot is pretty sore. It hurts when I walk. My right foot feels normal, even with the pins still being in, they feel normal, no pain at all. I don't know why it hurting, other than from wiping and trying to use a Q tip to clean in between my toes, to avoid pulling them apart.

***Update***

I guess today was not my day after all. I didn't get my pins out. He said the pins in my 2nd toes were ready to come out, but he really didn't want the pins in my 4th toes out just yet. He wants to keep them in for 10 more days. Ugh!

He then went on to say that he could take the pins out, but then he would want to bind it with tape to the toes next to it, for support. He said that there was more work done on my 4th toe, than it was on my 2nd and if he doesn't let the bone heal properly with the support of the pin, scar tissue could develop around the bone and I could have problems down the road.

Of course I said leave the pin in all toes and I will return in 10 days to get them all out. I know that leaving the pins in longer could mean it will hurt less when taking them out. So, 10 more days, well actually its 11 because the 10th days is a Sunday; 11 more days and I am free.

He said that once the pins come out, he wants to see me in 3-4 weeks after that for my last appointment. He also said that once the pins come out of my toes, I can wear normal shoes if I can tolerate it.

The incisions on my pinkie toes look like they have split apart, but he said this is normal. He also said my pinkie toes will take the longest to heal. I forgot why he said that thought...Sorry.

Bummed, but so glad things are going well. He was very impressed with the way things were looking. I was happy about that.

So...I won't write unless I have something to tell. Hoping things stay good though :)

Thank you for reading.

27 days post op...Like the way my right foot looks so far.

17 days post Op

27 days post Op

Well my bandage was slipping off on my right foot...again. So, I had to re-wrap it and got a nice surprise. My toes look even better since I re-wrapped them just the other day. The scars on my pinkie and the one right below it have smoothed out completely in comparison to how they were at first. My pinkie toe car does look like it's not closed all the way and I can't help but wonder if the stitches should have stayed in or if I widened some how. It tends to feel a little sore, but because there is no blood, pus or redness, I'm not going to worry too much.

I don't know what's going on with the pin in my 4th toe and my third toe, but the pin is sitting right on top of it and I can feel it. It's not aggravating the pin, it's just I can feel the pressure on my toe. No pain, but it is annoying. I'm going to assume my 4th toe is swollen and that's why the pin is sitting on top of it. It's like this on both toes actually.

The skin is peeling really bad, even on the bottom of my feet; that's why it looks so wrinkled. I am feeling good about my progress so far!

Today I was feeling brave enough to drive!!!!!

I needed to feel some independence today so I decided to drive myself (my teen cousin went with to help me out)) to Walmart today and to my aunts house; and I did just fine. The looks on my cousins and their friend's faces when I got out of the truck with these hideous shoes on, walking like a duck, crutches in tow, was priceless. They all had blank stares at first and then in unison they started to laugh at me. I couldn't do anything but laugh with them; because I felt like a funny sight.

I have noticed that my feet tend to get swollen if they have not been elevated in a while. I have them elevated now actually. I keep wondering if this will go away once the pins are out, but something tells me it won't. On some blogs I have read that it takes 6 months to a year to completely heal. I am expecting the worst, but hoping for the best!

No pain at all, even with the swelling and I am happy for that! Counting my blessings. Praying for constant healing. Anxious for the pins to come out!! Patience! I tell myself. Patience.

Thanks for reading. Have a goodnight!

Soooo glad I did both feet at once!

I woke up today feeling very irritated. I am sooo ready for these pins to come out! I am sick of these shoes. I am sick of walking on my heels. I am sick of sleeping on my back and side; and constantly having to be aware of how I am moving my feet in the bed.

However, I am sooo glad I did both feet at once. Yes. it would have been easier to get around with just one foot down, but I would still not get around as good. I am sure that I would still be ready for the pins to come out if I had only done one foot. It gets irritating after a while. I hear that some doctors won't let you get both feet done at once. My friend's sister in law had bunions removed, but her doctor said she could only do one foot at a time. She was 27 at the time of surgery. I can understand not allowing an elderly person to do this, but not someone younger. I think it should be that person's choice....In my opinion.

When I go for my doctor's visit to get my pins out, I will have had them in for 4 weeks and 2 days. My doctor said the pins will come out as soon as 4 weeks, but the xrays will determine that during my visit. Praying for good xrays!

 I think my healing is going very well. As long as I don't over do it on my feet (walking, standing) I don't have any pain or discomfort. Occasionally I feel the stabbing pain, but I haven't felt that in a few days now.

I once read about the dead peeling skin. My big toes are starting to peel and it's kind of yucky to me because the skin that is peeling is thicker. I tried to get to it with my exfoliating gloves this morning while in the tub, but with the ace bandages being in the way, I didn't do to well. So, I put baby oil on them and it made them look better.

I can not wait until everything heals. I am going to get a nice foot massage and pedicure! Oh my. I can not wait!

Went out yesterday....feet swelled!

I don't know what I was thinking, but I decided to go to Target yesterday with my cousin and since there weren't any "handicap carts" I walked (with my crutches). To say the least, it was very irresponsible of me to do that. My feet were swelling, feeling very tight and uncomfortable; and they stayed that way until I fell asleep with ice on my ankles that night.

I woke up this morning and they feel fine, thank God! I was very worried. I wouldn't advise doing that at all. Yesterday I kept feeling sharp pains shooting through my toe with the pin, on the left foot; this was before going to the store. Actually it had been going on for about 2-3 days prior. I did some digging on the internet and learned that this was normal. I am hoping this is a sign the pin are ready to come out. Probably not...lol

I had to re-wrap my feet because the bandages started slipping off and it got to the point where when I pulled them back down on my feet, they did not re position the right way so I had to re-do them. I was nervous because I was afraid I wouldn't re-wrap them correctly, but I did ok I guess. I was happy about being able to wash my feet though! Oh yes, a good way to deal with the dead/peeling skin...use exfoliating gloves. It works wonders for removing all of the peeling skin off of your feet (not as good on the bottom), BUT the next day it was back peeling again.

Remember the leaning toe on my left foot that I talked about (the second toe that was really leaning over my big toe) it's not leaning anymore. Now, there was some overlap prior to surgery and I would say the overlap that's there now is the same as it was before surgery. The darkness on my toes have even started to lighten.

My cuts still look the same though. I know they are healing because I can feel some itching, but they don't look like they have healed a whole lot since I had the stitches taken out. I wish I would have taken photos for you guys to see, but I didn't think to. Sorry.

And yes! I could not stand looking at my toe with no polish on it any longer. So, I painted my big toe!

Hammertoe Surgery...Just a thought about the blood clot, but an important one.

Hello! I was just sitting here thinking about my ordeal with the blood clots and reflecting on comments that were made by doctors in the ER and hospital; and realizing my doctor asked the same question..."Were you not able to move around much after surgery".


Then suddenly it dawned on me...My discharge paper said elevate at heart level for 72 hours. I elevated every day, all day. More than 2 weeks. I was so busy trying to keep my feet elevated, that I didn't move around much. I say this to say that although elevating definitely keeps the swelling at bay, I think I did more harm than good and could have contributed to getting the blood clot by NOT moving around much, just to keep my feet elevated.


So, I would advise, listen to your doctor when it comes to elevating your feet and elevate as needed, thereafter. Hindsight is 20/20.

Hammertoe Surgery....Stitches out!!!!!

Left Foot...see the leaning second toe!

The side cute by my pinkie toe is from the Tailors Bunion being re-done. The second
toe looks battered and bruised because he said  he had a hard time straightening it and to be honest it isn't totally straight.

I finally got my stitches out!!! It hurt a little, but nothing like I thought it would. I guess you could say it was more uncomfortable than it actually hurt. My third toe on each foot had stitches in the back at the base of the toe and they actually did hurt some. I must admit my toes didn't look as slaughtered....lol...as I thought they would, but one toe (the second toe on my left foot) was so ugly that I was too embarrassed to post the picture that showed this more clearly...sorry :(


The toe was leaning over my big toe! Grrrr. It was clearly due to the way it was wrapped after surgery. My doctor said it would be fine and wrapped it together with the next two toes. I love seeing my toes straight and I want to feel more excited, but that one toe (the second toe) is affecting my excitement. I will remain positive though!


I'm not driving and I honestly don't know if I can. I am not having any pain in my toes, at all, but I do notice that after a while they start to feel numb when I am sitting on a chair, sofa, etc; and elevating is the only thing that helps. I sure hope this stops after the pins come out. I am walking much better (still bearing all the weight on my heels).


They are wrapped in gauge again. So, I can't start my scar treatment with the awesome scar treatment gel called Newgel +. I am sooo anxious to start because I have used it before and the results are amazing!  I will not have the luxury of dipping my toes in water either. He said that I could wrap them in saran wrap really good and if they get a little wet in the shower, it won't hurt, but the whole idea of not getting them wet (very wet) while the pins are in, is to avoid bacteria setting up in the toes that have the pin. Ok...so I am not taking a chance.

Funny thing..while the medical assistant was up close and personal with my feet taking my bandages off, she pointed out that my toes had no smell at all. Embarrassed, I laughed, but relieved because I did think about that on the way to the doctor! I think they didn't smell because It's not hot outside (where I am) yet and my feet aren't sweating. I do wash the part that isn't wrapped though.

 I am sooooo ready for this to be over! Well, that's all for now. Thanks for reading. Goodnight.

Hammertoe Surgery...BLOOD CLOT!!!!!

Hello! Where do I begin?? Remember the symptoms I talked about? Well...turns out they were related to the surgery. I had a blood clot that traveled from my leg to my lung. I was told that it could have been a mix between the surgery and the depo shot (birth control) that I am taking. I pray no one ever has to go through what I went through. The pain was so intense, I thought I would die.

 I only spent two days in the hospital, but I left with pain that I could control with the pain meds I was given. Today is the first day I have felt like myself in about two weeks. I actually feel good today.

I wish my surgeon would have taken extra precautions during the surgery. Now I wonder what is the purpose of being asked what medications you are on, if they aren't researched for side effects. If I had known that the two (surgery and depo) could increase my chances of a blood clot, I would have expressed my concerns with the doctor and asked him to take extra precautions.

Well my stitches aren't out yet, but I will be getting them out today! Talk to you soon.

Hammertoe surgery...getting anxious!

Hello! I have not been feeling well over the past few days and although I can't help but worry if it is surgery related, I honestly don't think that it is. I had all the signs of an infection that started this past Tuesday...the very next day after I had gone in to see my doctor. I think the only thing that kept me reassured that it wasn't an infection, was that my feet (toes) didn't hurt or feel swollen...at all. My ankles weren't swollen either.


I had a fever and chills that kept coming and going up until yesterday. Then I had stomach pains all day yesterday. I was feeling fatigued, even up until this morning. I kind of feel I should not be mentioning this since I don't think it's related, but I get my stitches out Monday and if anything comes up...well I had some of the signs.


One thing I will say for sure that I know is surgery related and this is quite embarrassing, but I had constipation because of the pain meds. So, I recommend preparing yourself with a couple enemas, laxatives or whatever you use or load up with fiber because if you aren't taking any extra precautions and you are taking the pain meds, you are going to get constipated and if you let it get to far gone, your only relief might be the hospital...no kidding.


My feet were feeling a little uncomfortable today and with the headache I had, I decided to take an Aleve, that actually worked faster on my feet than it did on my headache. My right foot feels less numb and strange than my left. Of course I am still elevating, all day everyday, but I try to move my feet around by the ankles to help with circulation and it actually seems to help....a little.


I would give anything to massage my toes right about now! I am already so tired of "this" whole thing, but that could be do to other things in my life that are stressful right now too. I also think that the possibility of my doctor having not removing the corns on the toes as he said he would, has me feeling irritated about the whole process.


I mean, let's be honest. My toes were hideous and this whole process is a lot to deal with; and you sacrifice tremendously in a lot of ways and you deal with a lot of pain. Why would I want to go through this, without knowing that I will have better looking toes to the best of the doctor's ability? I may have found another surgeon. One who is not only interested in fixing the problem, but also interested in the cosmetic aspects of the final result. I think a surgeon who is not interested in the cosmetic aspects, is a somewhat outdated surgeon and knowing this, I would have no interest in working with that surgeon. Hammertoes are ugly toes! Why straighten the toes and leave the corns??? Corns still make toes ugly, right? So, no more hammertoes, but you still have ugly toes!


So, with that being said...choose your surgeon wisely. Ask for what you want done. If you have corns, ask that they be removed, to be sure they will be gone. Why wait, when your already under the knife. It can be done! If your surgeon is not interested in the cosmetic aspect of the surgery, but that's important to you, maybe you should get a second opinion.


Well...thanks for reading. Goodnight.